"I want you to stop horseback riding so that I don't have to work, and I can focus on writing my screenplay," my husband said at the celebration dinner for my new six-figure job. I had worked for months to get the offer, and it would finally allow me to take horseback riding lessons at the little farm up Topanga Canyon more than once a week. I had been aching to get back in the saddle, something I loved throughout my lifetime.

Chad was a writer, director, and producer for reality TV, and I had a modest-paying job in content marketing. We lived a simple life in Santa Monica, but my new career changed everything.

"You've married the wrong girl." I thought to myself but didn't dare say out of fear of the temper for which he held a reputation.

It was never about the horse. It was the question of what I was willing to give up for an idea of us. It was the fallout if I betrayed the half-truths, mistruths, and denials that I grew up with and accepted as a good "Preacher's Kid".

This was my breaking point and I had a choice. Lose me... or lose the horse.

This is my story of the friendships and animals who helped me find my voice and the courage to heal. This book contains explicit material, including language, and sexual situations, and is suitable for adults. Reader discretion is advised.

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• Parenting & Relationships

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